It's a sobering fact, but everyone with whom we come in contact today will have some impact on us and we will have some impact on them. Sure, in passing, brief contact that impact might be small but in many other ways, actions and words have the potential for a great deal of good, or ill.
There are some people I know who seldom, if ever, encourage me. Yes, I know its probably not always their fault. I would agree that my attitude has a lot to do with it. But I also know that those people almost always rub me the wrong way, make me more aware of my faults and shortcomings than my success and end up making me think impossibilities rather than possibilities.
There again, there are others who almost always encourage me. They make me want to do better, want never to quit, and think things are possible. I'm sure this subject is worthy of more space than I have here, but let me suggest some things that make the difference between the two kinds of people.
Encouragers manage to communicate real love and care. Discouragers often make you feel like you're an inconvenience or a bother. The power of encouragers is in their ability to let you know that you matter, that you are important and, are valuable.
Encouragers manage to communicate that they think you're capable of something good. They do not whitewash your problems. In fact, they quite often are the ones who point out your specific failings. But they don't leave you hopeless. They leave you thinking that better things are possible.
Encouragers focus on the right things. Discouragers usually camp out on things that condemn and belittle. Encouragers put their energy into moving you forward, not bogging you down in despair.
Encouragers know the right words to say. Perhaps it's because they know you, or because it's just the way they put things, but what they say build you up instead of tearing you down.
Encouragers make you believe they are on your side. Discouragers make you think they'd prefer that you failed, or just went away. Encouragers accept you and make you feel wanted.
I'm sure there is more to it than these few things, but as I think of the people in my life who consistently encourage me, these few elements are crucial. Over the years, I've watched folks respond to those who tried to help. Some soared to new heights while others were crushed. The difference has often been a small deed, a brief word - but there was a powerful difference between the two. Which kind of impact will you have on people today?
